FUNNY PASSWORDS FOR WORK REGISTRATION
FUNNY PASSWORDS FOR WORK PASSWORD

FUNNY PASSWORDS FOR WORK PASSWORD

“But Joel,” you might be protesting aloud at your screen, “using a single password for multiple services is a terrible idea. Many apps opt to do this the easy way - sticking to the status quo and treating their users like children. Instead, the application must carry the burden. Every semester began with a stark reminder that in the context of this school, you would always be treated like a child.Ī similar idea provides the foundation for online password security - users carry no responsibility for their personal account’s security. The constant repetition of these regulations was based on the fundamental idea that students carried no personal responsibility for their education. Don’t open your laptops in class (so you can’t focus on other things), don’t miss class more than 3 times (so you don’t miss too much), don’t plagiarize (because it’s not obvious), don’t cheat, don’t be late, and so forth. When I was in college, teachers were instructed to repeat the ground rules at the start of every course. You know what non-technical people with a lot of passwords do? They write them down on sticky notes. We’ve only covered a small sample of the password rules that can get in your way, but you’re already using either $$ICECREAM$$, $$IceCream100$$, IceCream100 or iceCREAM100 for a multitude of different sites you frequent and you lose track every other day, all because developers with your best interests in mind thought they were helping. Password hell, courtesy of The Attorney General of Texas Child Support website. So now this single site’s password is iceCREAM100, at least until the next time you forget it, which is as likely as not to be the next time you try to log in. This sucks, because you have to use a permutation even further out from your default password.

FUNNY PASSWORDS FOR WORK REGISTRATION

“I know a way around that,” one of them says with conviction, “let’s add a dumb fucking rule to our registration system.” No company would actually do this though, right? Is this real life? How does this thing even exist? As if the people behind it imagined you scribbling your previous passwords on random toilet stalls across the country.

You cannot use a previously used password.

You type in IceCream100 again and click submit. The good news is, your brain makes the same connections as before and now you remember what your password was. If you’re me, this is the point where your left eye starts to twitch in fury. The service then reminds you that you can’t use numbers. It’s time to use the password reset link again, which at this point is basically your login button. You try some other permutations you’ve used in the past.

The problem is that when you try to log in the next time, the system doesn’t remind you that it has a wonky password policy. So, okay, exclusively for this finicky service you agree to drop the $$ and use IceCream100 instead. Protip: add restraints to reduce possible permutations and make passwords easier to crack. Maybe they dislike special characters but need numbers, maybe they hate numbers but require special characters. That’s the thing about opinionated services - they often disagree. You used it for 6 products before you hit one that wasn’t cool with it. So $$IceCream100$$ was nice while it lasted. You cannot use special characters in your password. Not a perfect day, but all in all, you’re happy. Since this password is more secure anyway, you decide to make it your new go-to password. Your password for this service is now $$IceCream100$$. Unfortunately $$ICECREAM$$ doesn’t include a lowercase letter and a number, and is thus objectively insecure. It’s easy to remember because ice cream is literally your favorite thing, a beacon of light in this terrible world, and the password has a few special characters to boot. Let’s assume your go-to password is $$ICECREAM$$. You must use at least 1 symbol, 1 number, 1 uppercase letter, and 1 lowercase letter.įorget about the now famous XKCD strip that proves a long lowercase password is more secure than a short dollar-sign-riddled password. Your password could very well be secure, but the opinionated service you’re trying to use disagrees. You register for a new service, type in your chosen password, but can’t get in.

Funny passwords for work